Loving Funerals

A loving funeral is essential. But isn’t easy to set up a loving funeral. Most of us no longer have a local priest or person to turn to. The vicar or celebrant recommended by a Funeral Director rarely fulfils the task, and to try and carry out the funeral oneself can also be nearly impossible for a thousand reasons, not least the sheer pressure of living with one’s own loss, which can be draining both emotionally and physically.

Many religious people want a funeral done in the usual way, but for some of us this is not what we want. Religion is man-made; spiritual awareness is cosmic. Choice is part of our lives, and this applies to our spiritual lives. Many of us are spiritually aware but not attached to any particular faith, and some celebrants are not prepared to support our need for freedom.  There is a beautiful specialness in people, whether they have no interest in anything or have a passion for embroidery, making doll’s houses out of match-boxes, sport, animals, grandchildren, gardening or mountain climbing. Everyone is unique and it is so important that their unique character is honoured at their funeral.

Funerals today are best when they are loving, insightful, and if possible friendly… and they can be friendly whether there are three people present or 300. They don’t need to be sentimental but they do need to be authentic. A funeral must serve two purposes – to make those present feel connected with the person that has died, and to empower people that come to the funeral to feel better for the experience, and appreciate a moment of connection at the deepest level.

I know when I have carried out a funeral successfully. It’s when somebody comes up to me and says “did you know him? I was under the impression you knew him really well…” also when somebody says “She would have really loved this service… it’s as if she was here.” 

Over the years I have written many funeral readings for some very special people. The specialness of each person and each funeral helps to create funerals for other unique women, men and children. But with every funeral there is always something different, beautiful, radiant and unexpected. The readings I have created for these unique people can be found on my website – funeral readings.

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