And then my computer went… PHUT!

To be honest, it’s not completely dead, it has parted from me, but not on friendly terms, at all… Yet despite the unpleasantness between us, it has gone to a good home. About a month back or more I went to look at my emails on Outlook Express, a particularly nasty little piece of Microsoft software which is about as intuitive as a ham roll, only the ham roll has the edge, and is certainly better at dealing with emails. I found myself looking at a very blank page that stared back at me in a rude and defiant sort of way, as if to say, those 7,000 dreary emails that sat in this box for the past 10 years, gathering dust, made me sick, so push off.Unknown-2It was as if Fairy Fartface had come along with her dear little wand and smashed my computer over the nut, leaving it with a determination not to play with me ever again… a real attitude, it seemed to me. People in the family took pity on me, and a new IMac was found because the old one was quite old, and I think they were fed up with the horrible screams coming from the attic, like a modern day Bertha Mason. So I got this shiny new computer that is almost silent  – its predecessor had never entirely recovered after being struck by lightning; the power surge meant it lost great chunks of memory. A new hard disk was put in to replace the old burnt-out half-wit half-brain, but the result was never as before ­— after that it burped and belched and hiccupped its way through the working day, which was unpeaceful. But this new beast is so slim, and fast, and sleek, and the email software – Apple’s own thing – is very smooth, and also more sensible.

But there is a downside to all this; six weeks have passed since I wrote the bloggety blog thing, and this apparently means that the two people that read the Antbeat page will now dwindle to one, which is almost sad, but not quite.

What is infuriating is that so many exciting things have happened, so many blog-deserving stories have popped up, but without anything to write on they might as well never have been. It seemed as if a zillion wonderful tales trickled away into outer space… and because my computer went PHUT… my brain went PHUT in sympathy. Have I really had a technological breakdown and hissy fit that lasted six weeks???? Apparently Pluto is doing something on my chart, bounding across the page maybe. Unknown-1 Unknown